Meaningless
by ISFDY
Summary: Everything he did... Everything he said... It was meaningless to him and she knew it. Yet it meant the world to her. Troypay. Btw I suck at summaries.
1. Chapter 1

**I was kind of free-writing and this came out. The times make no sense and everyone is out of charactor. I'm not really sure how this would fit in any timeline but hey – it's called fanfiction for a reason.**

They used to sit out at night watching the stars, he would lay his head on her chest and listen to her heartbeat. She would sing to him. He would tell her how much he loved her.

They were stupid, young and claimed that they were in love. Not a care in the world. It didn't matter where they stood, all that mattered that they had each other to hold on to. It didn't last of course – they knew it wouldn't from the very beginning. It was to end when school was to start again. The only reason they kept each other around was because she would make him feel better and he would make it seem worth it, then that was it. They had nothing else.

Ryan would often remind her that it was wrong to do. He after all had a girlfriend, despite the fact all he ever did was complain about her, he loved Gabriella too. She would scream and cry and try to convince herself more then Ryan that deep inside Troy really did care about her, more then he did for Gabriella.

She had longed for Troy for so, so long. She would take him any day. Everything he did, everything he said – it's meaningless , it was a lie. And she knew it damn well but it made Sharpay glow, made her feel loved. That was enough for her to make him feel happy back.

Their short fling was over before they realized it and it was back to school for them. Back to being who they were. The bitch and the Jock.

When he leaned in to kiss her for the last time, ending the summer relationship, she pulled away first. He was surprised at this but didn't question it. "Goodbye." He muttered, pulling some of her blonde hair behind her ear.

She bit her lip and nodded, not trusting herself enough to say anything until he was gone.

As she watched him go and felt her heart break.

"Goodbye Troy..." She said once he was out of sight, a tear rolling down her cheek before she turned around and made her way back to her vacation house.

xXx

She ever-so-perfectly packed her clothes away, neatly putting them in her suitecase while Ryan leaned on the doorway, smircking.

"What?!" she snapped angrily, not really in the mood to deal with him.

"How's Troy?" He teased, knowing he was touching a spot which wasn't meant to be touched. She froze, recalling the soft kiss he left on her lips. The only proof she had left that there was a her and Troy was the taste of him, still fresh on her lips. She licked them before answering, her back still to her brother.

"None of your business."

But of course it was – she would end up telling him anyway. She had always told him everything. He would disapprove and argue mostly, but he was happy to be part of her life.

"How was it?"

She cracked.

"I can still taste him. I still sense him on my skin-"

Ryan shuddered at the thought of it, too much info. Sharpay laughed at her brother, he was never good with this type of stuff.

She hugged herself.

"I don't know how I'm going to cope. Seeing him every day with Gabriella. . It's going to kill me, even more then it did before. . ."

She didn't hear her brother move, or notice that he was standing next to her. She jumped at the feel of his cold hands when they squeezed her shoulders.

"It'll be okay." He whispers into her ear. But they both know it wouldn't.

**A/N I know Sharpay is out of charactor, but she'll be back to her old self again soon-ish :D**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2:**

**A/N Okay a couple of things, firstly I'm pretty sure that the "Sharpettes" don't go to East High but It's kind of sad that Sharpay practically has no friends in a way. **

**I promise that I will attempt to make the next chapter more interesting and worth the wait. I'm so sorry for a long wait! This was done like 3 month ago. . . I had this chapter in my notebook for a long time but couldn't be bothered to ever type it up and completely forgotten about it until well . . . Now. Anyways forgive me and read! **

She watched bitterly as the two passed notes to each other in class with little love hearts scribbled in pink on them. She hated this: Watching from afar. It was the first day and already she was dying inside.

It was homeroom. Who passes notes in homeroom?! ON THE FIRST DAY!

Ms. Darbus didn't seem to notice and kept lecturing the students about her favourite topic: "The evils of cell phones." Not much has changed.

When the bell rang, she couldn't wait but get out of there. The Sharpettes following her, chattering away to each other. She ignored the conversation and she walked, stealing a gaze at Troy, who had Gabriella pinned to a wall.

She squeezed her eyes shut.

A few days ago that was her, giggling and moaning with Troy. Her stomach did a twist and she throw her hand over her mouth. Holding back, she ran to the bathroom and threw up.

She didn't feel so good these last couple of days. For all she knew it was because of looking at Troy with Gabriella.

It was as if someone was cutting her open. The pain felt so physical, burning through her chest.

She shook her head. No, no! She didn't want to feel pain. She didn't want this. She had wondered since when had she become so weak? She was always the strong one, Ryan got the weak trait.

As soon as she stepped out of the bathroom the first thing that she saw was Troy and Gabriella holding hands and looking into each other's eyes.

It's like they were stalking her.

Gabriella froze for a moment, acknowledging her presence.

"Hey Sharpay." She said cheerfully with a smile.

Uhg, that smile only made her want to throw up all over again.

She gave her a famous look that was well-known by bitches. The Why-the-hell-are-you-talking-to-me Look.

Gabriella went on talking about something; luckily she didn't stop to ask questions because Sharpay wasn't listening. Her eyes were focused on the figure next to her.

Troy's eyes locked with hers and she could see the lust and hunger in them very well. She wasn't about to make the same mistakes again. But she wanted to.

It was fun and if she could, she'd do back and relive it she would but not now. Not after seeing them together like this. She had forgotten how lovey-dovey they were and how much they loved each other. More than he would ever love her.

She finally broke off her gaze and snapped her attention back to the girl in front of her.

Even though Sharpay was Barbie she had always thought Gabriella was perfect too. Just the way she stood was perfect. It was annoying.

"Enough about me, how about you? How was your summer?"

Sharpay thought about this for a second, stealing another glance at Troy again.

"It was. . ." she started, choosing her words carefully. "Interesting. Really something."

Troy made a sort of choking sound. Gabriella ignored it and offered her a smile.

"Good. Well. . . I guess I'll see you around."

And with that the couple locked hands once more and left.

XXX

The car ride with Ryan was silence apart from the radio playing softly. She didn't even complain about Ryan being late and having to wait around for him. She had no idea why her brother didn't mind being in a pink car, but decided not to question it.

Ryan shifted uncomfortably in his seat, and then turned off the radio.

"So um. . . How did it go today?"

She instantly knew what he meant.

"I'm dead on the inside." She meant it as a joke but she didn't realize how dead serious she sounded. Ryan touched her hand, which wasn't the smartest thing to do due to the fact that she was driving. But she knew he meant well.

She gave him a quick smile before turning back to the road.

XXX

Sharpay had woken up the next morning, feeling like hell. Her sickness was kicking in. She ran to the bathroom and threw up. She wondered why she was feeling sick lately, she probably just had the flu – but still. It worried her; the last thing she wanted was to get sick.

A faint feeling had blown through her as she checked herself in the mirror after she was done. Her hair was disheveled and her clothes were wrinkled, dark circles stood out from under her eyes, her face was beyond pale and her eyes were bloodshot. She bit her lip at the sight of herself. She was so messed up. And she knew it damn well. She stared at herself a bit more, trying to figure out how she ended up this way and why.

XXX

"Morning sleeping beauty!" Ryan teased as Sharpay entered the kitchen. She gave him a groan in return, acknowledging his presence.

He grinned and shoved another piece of pancakes in his mouth.

"Ow," Sharpay muttered as she twirled around. She tugged at her bra. Her breasts were swollen and it hurt her so much. She groaned again and turned back to Ryan, stealing his plate of half-eaten pancakes.

"Hey!" he cried and she grinned in return, shoving a piece into her mouth.

He glared at her and she continued grinning. She loved having Ryan around, even though, she'd never admit it out loud.

XXX.

The day seemed to past quickly from there, most of it being a blur.

Sharpay was nervously playing with her fingers as she waited for Ryan. He's always late. She sighs, leaning back onto her car. The parking lot was nearly empty and the halls were dead silence.

"Ryan!" she hissed under her breath to herself, cursing him.

"Sharpay," she looked up at the sound of her name, hoping it was Ryan calling out to her but her face fell as soon as she looked up. Troy.

She stood up straight and searched him. She went out of her way to purposely ignore him today and now all her hard work was ruined.

Yet ... She couldn't help but glow inside.

When he reached her and they stood together it felt like the world stopped. Memories of the summer had entered her mind, making her heart beat faster. A warm smile made its way onto her lips.

He tucked some of her blonde hair behind her ear, like he used to do. She was too dazed to care. It didn't matter that he had Gabriella now, she would be his dirty little secret any day.

"Hi Troy!" she managed to squeak out.

"I've wanted to talk to you," he said, all out of breath. "I really need to tell you something. . ."

Lies, lies, lies. It was all lies what he kept telling her, whispering loving words into her ear to make her think she loved him. It was lame and she was completely aware of what he was doing. But she wasn't about to turn him away.

Summer was so vivid and fresh in her mind. Was it a crime that she wanted to be loved? Someone to hold her?

Troy placed a soft kiss on her lips before leaving her all over again.

She didn't watch as he left or said anything to him. She just held back the tears.

**A/N Haha am i being too o****bvious here? I truly don't remember writing this. Expect updates soon **


	3. Chapter 3

Poke.

"C'mon, wake up!"

Groan.

"Shar!"

Moan.

"SHAR!"

Tired mutter.

"Troy?"

Groan.

"Shar, I swear, I will take a bucket of water and pour it over your head if you don't wake up in the next two seconds."

Sharpay laughed, only half-awake she managed to drag herself out of bed. "C'mon, you're my ride to school!" Ryan urged, ushering her out of the room.

"I'm not going!" She finally said when they were half-way towards the car and she was still in her PJs.

Ryan looked confused, waiting for her to explain. "I'm taking the day off." She decided, crossing her arms over her chest. Ryan sigh and shrugged, knowing he couldn't argue with her. He didn't plan on bothering. No one notices when she takes the occasional day off, her parents were never home and her peers were mostly glad. She threw Ryan her keys, who caught them with ease.

"So what are you gonna do all day?" He asked as he opened the door to her pink sport car.

"Dunno."

He sighs, running his hand through his hair. It was a habit he had picked up.

"Sharpay, you can't keep taking days off like this, really you-"

"I'm not feeling well!" She argued, this wasn't exactly a lie. She had been throwing-up none stop and getting so much mood swings. Ryan cringed, it was probably her time of the month.

"Be safe" he says as he starts the car and then drives off. She had wondered whether if he was really late or if he just stopped bothering.

"Yeah, whatever." She said, a little too late. With a sigh she made her way back inside the house.

XXX

Troy smiled as he leaned in to whisper something into Gabriella's ear.

It was homeroom and they were early so decided it was a good time and play around a bit. Gabriella was sitting on Troy's desk, swinging her legs and humming. She giggled as Troy and he placed a kiss on her lips.

"Eh, you two make me sick!" Exclaimed Chad as he walked in, hand-to-hand with Taylor. Troy and Gabriella both laughed at the irony of it.

A few second later Ryan entered alone, just as Gabriella jumped off Troy's desk before Ms. Darbus appeared at the door as well.

"Hey," Troy said as Ryan filled up the empty seat next to him. "Where's Sharpay?"

Poor Troy, he was unaware of the fact Ryan knew everything – and was stepping into older brother mode. "Sick?" He muttered, making it sound like a question. His voice was harsh.

Troy hesistated for a brief second. He spend alot of time thinking about his realationship with Sharpay, trying to figure out what to make out of it and what it is. He wanted everything to be a mistake, but deep inside. He couldn't make it to be something it's not. He couldn't deny that he had enjoyed summer, more then he should have.

Her missed her in class today. And the next day and the next. It was as if she disappeared off the face of the earth. Although Ryan was there every day with a smile. Days passed quickly and that summer was nearly forgotten.

XXX

Ryan waved to his friends as they drove away and made his way into the house. Sharpay was laying on the sofa wrapped in a blanket. "Shar?" He whispered lightly.

She groaned and forced herself to sit up as he sat next to her and put a hand to her forehead.

"You've been sick for ages. Maybe you should do see a doctor..." he suggested. Knowing how this conversation would end.

Sharpay jumped at the word. It's not that she hated doctors, well at least not personally. It's the hospital she hates. Just thinking about all the sick kids in there dying made her shudder.

"I-i'm fine. Just one more day?" she begged.

Ryan sighed and ran a hand through his hair. It was getting long. "It's not up to me, Shar." He said.

She laid back down and sniffled. She had been home all week and has done nothing but cry and shove ice-cream down her throat. She closed her eyes in attempted to rest.

"Sharpay," he said after the a couple of mintues of slience as he slide closer to her. She was surprised that he used her full name. "Please" He whispered, begging.

Her eyes fluttered open, she opened her mouth to argue but then topped and closed it again after a glimpse of Ryan's face. He looked so worried and sad.

It had hurt her to look. After a couple of short seconds she sigh and looked back up.

"Okay..." She whispered. "I'll go."

Her heart felt so heavy.

Ryan smiled and pulled her into a tight embrace. Suprisingly enough, she didn't pull away or shot a snappy comment at him. She felt too weak to even do that.

XXX

Troy stood outside the big house, his hands were shoved into the pockets of his shorts. He was still sweaty from practice. He paced around the doorstep, thinking about what he's going to say.

He didn't plan this. He just sort of ended up here. Maybe deep inside he really wanted to come, he had a date with Gabriella in an hour but that didn't stop him from staying there.

The neighbours had probably thought he was a creepy stalker or something by now, when he was really just pacing there for hours on end.

Finally he decided to be brave and knocked on the door. He held his breath.

The door slowly opened and a petite blonde peeked out at him.

"Sharpay!" He didn't realize how happy he sounded. He blushed slightly at his loudness. "Hi."

He missed her face, her smile. Just everything. Looking at her now.. She looked so messed up. But to him she was beautiful all the same.

"What do you want, Bolton?" she didn't really seem happy about seeing him.

The boy she had – and still does – long for, the boy who she said that she'd take anyday had actually cared enough to come. Although she found that a part of her was pushing him away.

"I bought your homework. . . Can I, um, come in?" He asked nervously as he tugged his backpack. It was a lame excuse for coming to see her and was cliché but it was enough to let him in.

She sigh and nodded, then opened the door fully and stepped aside.

Troy smiled at her as he made his way into the house. Her following close behind.

"You, erm, want something to eat? Something to drink?" She asked, still not looking too happy. She just wanted to get him out as quick as possible – but still try to be nice about it.

"No thanks. I'm cool."

They stood awkweirdly for a few mintues in slience.

"Homework?" Sharpay decided to break the ice first.

"Huh?"

"You said you bought my homework?" She attempted to remind him. He seemed really dazed and deep in thought.

She hoped they won't end up doing it, She didn't want to. But she knew that Troy had his ways to get what he wanted.

"Oh yeah!" He chuckled in rememberance and reached inside his school bag.

Slowly, he pulled out a few pieces of papers and handed them to her. "Thanks" she mumbled, taking them.

Before Troy could say another word she was already dragging him out of the house.

"Wait. WAIT!" He only half-screamed when they reached the door.

She sigh again.

"What?"

"How come you don't come to school anyone?" He asked. He of course could've used better words. He could've even told her that he missed her, but he didn't bring himself to.

"I've been sick" She said simply. It sounded like a lie the way she said it and that was exactly what Troy thought.

"You don't look sick" he shot back. He was right, she didn't look sick. She looked frustrated that he didn't believe her, but didn't plan on wasting her time trying to make him believe her.

"Well, you don't have to look like something to be feeling it. I should know." She was meant to mutter it under her breath but instead she said it, every word with pain and even Troy - as looked into her deep eyes- he could see that pain. She didn't expect Troy to understand the meanings behind the word she had said. And he didn't. But the pain was clearly there and that was what had gotten to him.

"Shar..."

"Forget it." She said the cliché line and pushed him out.

He was back where he started, outside her door with nothing to say.


End file.
